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A Blog Post

I’m very happy that I managed to get the next chapter of The Solune Prince out on schedule. It was a stuggle, my internet is being finicky, and so is my brain. Thus, the chapter is a little short, but it is out! It exists!


You can read it here!

It seems that, for having the gall to quote Megadeth’s “Kill the King” line “Even if all my bones are broken / I will drag myself back from the edge…”

Though none of my bones were broken, my mind awoken,
A little lost, a little stranded,
God has tested my, my eyes abandoned,
My body in pains, feeling, testing.

Pain around the waist, pain in the eyes,
My head it hurts, my leg gives in
My head hurts, I sleep broken.
My head hurts, but I did it.

I guess, I am doing it.

I hope my exams turn out okay.
I’m definitely going to fail Effective Writing. I don’t know how that’s going to affect me or my academics. I struggle in courses with a lot of little assignments. I don’t really take them seriously and so I’ll miss one, and then another, and then…
Suddenly I’ve missed them all.

So I cling to myself, I cling, “Even if all my bones are broken / I will drag myself back from the edge…”

I feel lonely, I want to dance.
Can I dance with myself? I don’t think so,
Not in this messy room.

Woah to existence. I hope my roommate resets the damn router soon. He put it in his room so that he could hardline into his computer, but he never seems to reset it and I don’t want to be a creep.

Dude. Finish your breakfast already and notice the internet is down.

I’m leeching from the nearby university building. It’s really slow, and I have like one bar.

“Even if all my bones are broken / I will drag myself back from the edge…”

I’ve been dragged through exam week, sleeping, like, almost not at all. In fact, I wrote an exam, pulled an all nighter (though not on purpose) and then FUCK then AHH then I wrote a final essay. I have a feeling the damn thing made no sense. Luckily it wasn’t weighted very much.

Drag myself.

I’m bipolar, right now it’s depression time. I’m…fighting back. It’s hard. It’s really hard. People don’t believe you, at least the doctor did. Drag myself.

I hope the latest chapter of The Solune Prince made sense. I hope it didn’t suck. I worry a lot in general, but when I’m depressed, I worry a lot in particular. My brain is…it prefers to think about large-scale things. Particulars are…it’s a lot harder, so why does it want to think like that when I’m at my lowest? Drag myself back from the edge.

Oh, but I guess I’m also worried about a few huge things too.

Wait and see…sometimes it’s the only answer. You can’t really tell the future when you’re in the process.

But make plans, and set goals, and what is a goy to do? I confuse myself. The internet is still down. Do something man. I should complain, but I am a nervous man. FUCK.

Just…when you spiral, make sure you spiral outward, not inward. Spiral out. Spiral arrow.

Deja vu. Where is my wife. I want to marry her.

I’m not always

insane, but it comes and goes and it is me. I…Alexandre Dirge and her journals, they embody a lot of my struggles.

What’s happening to me, Lloyd?

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